How do you define yourself? Is your sense of self based on your level of success, what you have accomplished so far in life, or is it based on your values and how you decide to live your life. As for me, at this point, and for as long as I can remember, I have always been results and success driven. From my business life to my personal life, I felt I was only as good as what I had done lately. I have never been one to rest on my laurels, but I often use them as a stepping stone or foundation for future achievements. However, as I grow older, and hopefully wiser, I am trying to lead a values driven life. Intentionally making decisions throughout my day that lead to a better me. Rather than try and accomplish something that I think would look better to the outside world, I instead focus on accomplishing something that makes me feel better, and makes my family and family life better. From simple decisions, to complex actions, my goal lately has been to stay true to my word, take the path that may not be the easiest, but yield greater results, and to stand up for myself and what I believe is right.
While the values that I try to live my life by may not be all that complex at this point, they are at least a starting point or a road map for how to frame my actions. Growing up I was never given much direction from my parents. Other than telling me what not to do, I was never really told what I should be doing instead. Often times I will read an interview, or hear someone being interviewed on the radio and they will reminisce about how their parents or grandparents instilled a certain trait in them, or how their family had a certain code of ethics if you will. They will go on about how their father gave them advice on how to handle a situation, or relate an event from their childhood about how to handle a situation. I can honestly say, that as a 38 year old man, I have never even had a deep, let alone meaningful conversation with anyone in my family, excluding my wife and kids. From my parents to my grand parents, brother, sister, aunts, uncles or cousins, not once in my life have I, or they opened up, about anything. That is why as a 38 year old I am just now learning what it takes to be a man. I was never given a road map of the "right" way to act or live my life, instead I was taught to lie, cheat and deceive, to do just enough to make it look like you are doing what you are supposed to be doing. But leading that sort of life has left me empty, it has left me wanting more, more from myself and others.
I have learned over the past few years that the truth is often easier than lies. My life is better now that I am honest with myself and those that matter most. Being deceitful, lying and dishonest lead me to become a person I never imagined I would become. But I never really had an idea of what I should become. I was never shown by example what a person with honor, integrity and is honest looks like. Instead I was shown the opposite. What sort of person was I expecting to become if the closest examples in my life were failing me and didn't even know it? I was left on my own to figure out how best to survive, and I failed. I was never taught that the truth is the best possible answer, instead I was taught that perhaps the truth is what you decide is best at the time. Cover your ass, make excuses and hope for the best. What a great fucking way to live. Thanks mom and dad, great fucking job.
Having learned the hard way, I now like to think that I am finally getting better at the "right" way to live. I am holding myself responsible for my actions, and how they may impact those I love the most. And who knew that living the right way could actually be easier than living the way I did before. Now, I am able to have a clear conscience, because there are no lies. I am able to handle stress when it comes, because it is no longer a constant. Life is actually easier, more carefree since I started living the right way, I am happier and success is coming much easier. A clear, uncluttered mind is truly a beautiful thing.
I am also no longer looking for the easy way out of situations, no matter what they may be. Rather than walking away from a problem, I instead choose to try to and figure out a solution. Whether in family, or work or any other part of my life I choose the less easy path sometimes. Because I know that in the end, I will be much more satisfied having done something the right way instead of the easy way. If a problem presents itself, rather than throwing my hands up, I instead roll up my sleeves and set to work to try and find a solution. It may not always be pretty, but in the end, some sort of success is usually achieved, no matter how small. At the end of the day, I am always more pleased with myself knowing that I gave it my all, instead of just making it look like I did. Because once it is all said and done, when I am in the final days of my life, I would much rather look back and know I did my best when asked, and not just enough to give the impression of my best.
I am still working on who I want to be as a husband, father and man, but I have also learned lately that I can influence others, especially my kids. I can show them through my effort as well as by example what it means to be a good person. I can talk to them, teach them from my mistakes,
without revealing too much, right from wrong. I can actually do my job as a parent and lead them to become the best person that they can become. I can do all of this not because it is my job, but because I feel so strongly that it is the right thing to do. By teaching them right from wrong, I too will learn. By teaching them that you don't have to be the best at something, but you just have to try your hardest, and do the best that you are capable of doing, I too will learn. By teaching them that they are important, that they have a voice worth listening to, that their input counts, I too will realize the same for myself. I will teach them that a life lived without values, isn't much of a life at all.
Monday, July 29, 2013
Monday, July 22, 2013
The Future Begins Now
I'd like to think that I am equal parts dreamer and equal parts doer. At least that is how I perceive myself. I wonder if I were to take a few steps back, to disassociate myself from myself and become a casual observer, would I feel the same way. Or would I see myself as a blowhard, someone who talks a good game, but never really comes through.
When I envision my future, I see a successful, accomplished future me. I see a man that has gone after what he wants, someone who has brought his vision to reality. Someone who has dug deep, discovered what he wanted, put in the hard work and will soon realize the rewards. I have a goal that I am finally about to see come to light, at least the start of it. After all of the talking about what I want do in the future, I am finally ready to bring the talk to fruition. I planted the seeds in my mind nearly two years ago, now the time has come to watch the seeds grow into something incredible, to watch them blossom into what I have wanted them to be. I am ready to meet the future me.
Now the hard work begins. The long days that I now "enjoy" have just gotten a bit longer. But I will not be deterred by hard work. I will start methodically taking the steps that I need to take to bring my latest project into the light. I will call upon all of my desire, talent and dedication as well as those that I assemble for this project in order to bring it from vision to reality. My dream will slowly become my reality, and as time passes, I will transition from being the dreamer to the doer yet again.
I have a fire and a drive inside of me to succeed that I can no longer keep at bay. Once I set something in motion, I need to keep moving it forward, slowly at first while I build the necessary foundation to guarantee success, then with ever increasing speed and determination until it cannot be stopped. This dream will be realized, and it will most certainly be a success. I know this for a fact because I will not let it happen any other way.
And so, I now set forth on my latest adventure...
When I envision my future, I see a successful, accomplished future me. I see a man that has gone after what he wants, someone who has brought his vision to reality. Someone who has dug deep, discovered what he wanted, put in the hard work and will soon realize the rewards. I have a goal that I am finally about to see come to light, at least the start of it. After all of the talking about what I want do in the future, I am finally ready to bring the talk to fruition. I planted the seeds in my mind nearly two years ago, now the time has come to watch the seeds grow into something incredible, to watch them blossom into what I have wanted them to be. I am ready to meet the future me.
Now the hard work begins. The long days that I now "enjoy" have just gotten a bit longer. But I will not be deterred by hard work. I will start methodically taking the steps that I need to take to bring my latest project into the light. I will call upon all of my desire, talent and dedication as well as those that I assemble for this project in order to bring it from vision to reality. My dream will slowly become my reality, and as time passes, I will transition from being the dreamer to the doer yet again.
I have a fire and a drive inside of me to succeed that I can no longer keep at bay. Once I set something in motion, I need to keep moving it forward, slowly at first while I build the necessary foundation to guarantee success, then with ever increasing speed and determination until it cannot be stopped. This dream will be realized, and it will most certainly be a success. I know this for a fact because I will not let it happen any other way.
And so, I now set forth on my latest adventure...
Saturday, July 20, 2013
Words of Wisdom
"Many of those who are self-taught far excel the doctors, masters and bachelors of the most renowned universities."
Ludwig von Mises
Ludwig von Mises
Friday, July 19, 2013
100 Points To A Better Me
Years ago when I was just becoming a salesman I was given some advice on how to approach sales. In order to provide a little motivation or structure to ones day, you can play a game of 21 and assign point values to different tasks. For example, visiting a customer gets you three points, but calling them only earns you two. The theory was that once you reached twenty one points you had accomplished a pretty full day of work. Earlier today I was going over some strategies in order to better plan and structure my day and thought I could introduce a similar system to my entire day taking it a step further.
It turns out I can break down my day into four basic categories: Family, Work, Health and Life. Family and work are pretty obvious categories, the health category will involve mostly working out and diet and the so called life category might also be called personal growth or something along those lines. For the version 1.0 of what I am unofficially calling "100 Points To A Better Me" I have assigned the following values:
It turns out I can break down my day into four basic categories: Family, Work, Health and Life. Family and work are pretty obvious categories, the health category will involve mostly working out and diet and the so called life category might also be called personal growth or something along those lines. For the version 1.0 of what I am unofficially calling "100 Points To A Better Me" I have assigned the following values:
Family
3 points-extended quiet time/conversation with my wife
3 points-play time or project with the kids
2 points-sit down meal
2 points-read with the kids
Work
4 points-cold call
3 points- in person sales call
2 points-telephone call
1 point- email or text
1 point- adding a new item
Health
1 point-20 push ups
1 point-20 squats
3 points-run
3 points lift
1 point-a fruit or vegetable
-1 point- a can of soda
-3 points-fast food
2 points-floss
Life
3 points-setting a daily plan
3 points-blogging
2 points reading
2 points-house work
1 point-guitar practice
1 point-juggling practice
2 points-meditation/reflection/yoga
Now if I can make it to 100 points everyday will that make me a better person? Not likely. Will having some sort of structure in my life help me? Absolutely. I am going to give this idea a full 30 days to see how well I can implement it. I will add a widget on the sidebar so that I can keep a running total of how I am doing everyday as well. I look forward to seeing what the results end up looking like, because at this point I have absolutely no idea! Perhaps I will be able to uncover what some of my strengths and weaknesses are, and then make adjustments as my day and week progresses. This is going to be interesting...
Wednesday, July 17, 2013
Reset
How many times in your life have you ever wanted to hit the reset button? I know for myself there have been plenty. But have you ever really pressed it? I have, almost two years ago, and I have never looked back. From the absolute darkest days of my life, I have reset the entire course of my future, and all for the better.
I wont go into detail here, at least not at this point, but lets just say that I wasn't the man I was supposed to be. I wasn't living up to promises I had made to others, nor myself. I had become someone I despised on a daily basis, I absolutely hated myself. And in a single afternoon, with only one conversation with the most important person in my life, my wife, I set out to change my life. And almost two years to the day, I can report back that it is possible to hit the reset button. You can change your life, as long as you are willing to do so. Not to sound cliché, but the journey was tough. Those that loved me most, probably doubted it was possible, but as I sit here writing this today, I am proof that if you no longer are living the life that you dream of, if you have gone down a path and cant find your way back or if you have lost sight of what is most important, it is possible to turn things around.
I am hoping to use this blog as a teaching tool, not only for myself, but for other men that may need a little guidance in shaping their lives. I am not exactly sure yet at this early stage how I will best present my thoughts and strategies on how to become the man they believe themselves to be. But hopefully overtime a theme or structure will emerge from the chaos and randomness of my thoughts. Perhaps by telling my story, someone will see themselves in me and be able to relate and realize that they too can change, that success is possible if you want it bad enough.
As this project unfolds I will present my side of the story of how I came to be the man I am today. Good, bad and ugly, and everything in between, I will let my mistakes, triumphs and tragedies be not only a source of inspiration for others, but a reminder to myself of not only where I came from, but where I plan to go.
Monday, July 15, 2013
Exceeding Expectations
I know I will never always be able to live up to the above axiom, but I sure am going to try like hell to do so, on a daily basis, with everything I do. Surely that goal sounds lofty, but after all, isn't that the point of a goal? Put something just out of reach of the ordinary, so that you have to work just a bit harder in order to achieve it. And speaking of working just a bit harder, today I did just that.
I had been in a bit of a rut lately with work, namely the part of my job that involves selling. It had been a while since I had been on a cold call, mostly because it sucks getting the door slammed in your face over and over again. But today was different, and I can thank my neighbor for spurring me into action. During a casual conversation about my work day I mentioned how there is an entire portion of the Chicagoland area that the company I work for is extremely under represented. While in other parts of the city we literally own the market, in this one region we are pretty much nonexistent, and it happens to be the area in which I now live.
While mentioning this to my neighbor I had the proverbial "A Ha moment", the light bulb went off, I saw the sign, whatever else you want to call it. I decided then and there, mid-sentence, that my new mission would be to grow the region to the point that we will have to expand our business just to keep up with what I am doing there. Years ago I had made some cold calls that never panned out and based on that I had turned my back on an entire region that I deemed uninterested, or just didn't "get" what we had to offer. So for years now I have never even thought of trying to pursue any leads, but would rather try and fight it out in the other markets with the other salesman. Why? I have no idea.
If today was any indication of how the future will unfold though, then I am ready and willing to capitalize. I took my new found drive and capitalized on it. I put myself out there, knocked on some doors and was greeted with open arms. I was right where I needed to be, back on top of my game, doing what I do best, making connections. I killed it today, although it was only a few hours, I was on top, I was making it happen, I didn't have a single misstep, I was exceeding my own expectations. If today was good, then tomorrow should be even better. I know it won't always come as easy as it did today, but that's okay. Because with everyday that passes that goes well, I add firepower to my arsenal, I put the proverbial money in the bank, I sharpen my game, and I add a few more tools to my bag. In other words, I am better than I was the day before. And that's a pretty good feeling.
From This Day Forward
We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit. - Aristotle
You don't just happen to become great at what you do, whatever it may be, you have to work for it. Athletes train, fighters fight, writers write. You practice and practice and practice until whatever goal you are trying to reach or achieve becomes attainable. You can never expect to succeed by just willing something to happen, you have to work for it. That being said, I am putting in the work that I need to put in so that I can achieve my greatness.
My goals and dreams and aspirations are so much bigger than I am realizing right now. After a long talk with my wife this weekend, we both came to the conclusion that we are meant to do more, and be more with this life that we have been given. No longer will we sit idly by and wish for an opportunity to present itself, we will seek out the opportunity. No longer will we hope for an easy life, but rather embrace the challenges that come along and find ways to overcome them. No longer will we dream of what our futures may hold for us, but we will shape our present day actions and thoughts so that we fully realize our potential.
While certain aspects of our future may remain unknown to us at this time, one thing is absolutely certain, we will no longer be reactive, but only active in shaping not only our individual lives, but our family life as well. The hours will be long, and our sacrifices may be great, but in the end we will be realizing our full potential, and that cannot be underestimated. To live a full, complete, happy life without regret or what ifs will be the greatest gift we can give to ourselves.
Today marks a turning point for me. No longer will be I simply be a dreamer, but I will also be the doer. I will bring action to my plans and see them through to the end. I will embrace the challenges as they come, then find a solution for them. I will live in the present, enjoying the good life that we have, while laying the ground work for an even better future. I will work hard, not for my employers sake, but for my family's sake. I will not allow others to take advantage of me, but demand respect from those around me. I will stand up, be heard, and demand that others listen. I will achieve success once again, and fell proud of who I am and what I have created. But most of all I will create a life for my family based on excellence.
You don't just happen to become great at what you do, whatever it may be, you have to work for it. Athletes train, fighters fight, writers write. You practice and practice and practice until whatever goal you are trying to reach or achieve becomes attainable. You can never expect to succeed by just willing something to happen, you have to work for it. That being said, I am putting in the work that I need to put in so that I can achieve my greatness.
My goals and dreams and aspirations are so much bigger than I am realizing right now. After a long talk with my wife this weekend, we both came to the conclusion that we are meant to do more, and be more with this life that we have been given. No longer will we sit idly by and wish for an opportunity to present itself, we will seek out the opportunity. No longer will we hope for an easy life, but rather embrace the challenges that come along and find ways to overcome them. No longer will we dream of what our futures may hold for us, but we will shape our present day actions and thoughts so that we fully realize our potential.
While certain aspects of our future may remain unknown to us at this time, one thing is absolutely certain, we will no longer be reactive, but only active in shaping not only our individual lives, but our family life as well. The hours will be long, and our sacrifices may be great, but in the end we will be realizing our full potential, and that cannot be underestimated. To live a full, complete, happy life without regret or what ifs will be the greatest gift we can give to ourselves.
Today marks a turning point for me. No longer will be I simply be a dreamer, but I will also be the doer. I will bring action to my plans and see them through to the end. I will embrace the challenges as they come, then find a solution for them. I will live in the present, enjoying the good life that we have, while laying the ground work for an even better future. I will work hard, not for my employers sake, but for my family's sake. I will not allow others to take advantage of me, but demand respect from those around me. I will stand up, be heard, and demand that others listen. I will achieve success once again, and fell proud of who I am and what I have created. But most of all I will create a life for my family based on excellence.
Tuesday, September 11, 2012
What's Your Story?
It started with a simple request. "Mommy, tell me a story about when you were a kid". And in that one moment Jeni had to dig deep into her childhood to find a story with enough action, drama, intrigue and everything else that a five year old needs to stay in the moment and hear you out. Jeni brought up some random happenings from her days at Kennedy Park during the summer months of her youth, but struggled to truly tell a story with her memories. When she brought what had happened while putting Abbie to bed, I too was at a loss as to what sort of story I would be able to tell.
Memories can come back with little cohesion between them, but often times they are little more than just scenes from your youth. What does it take to turn random thoughts and experiences into a true story? If someone came up to you and asked you to tell them a story, what would you come up with? Perhaps your first trip to a baseball game, or that time you went camping and told ghost stories, maybe even your first day at a new school. What thoughts and emotions would you hope to be able to convey? Were you nervous that first day of school, maybe you sat front row at the baseball game and were awed by seeing your heroes up close and in the flesh. Do you have what it takes to draw in those around you with an amazing tale of your daring expeditions as an eight year old?
I for one am a lousy story teller. I can usually manage to start off well enough, building tension and painting a pretty good picture of the scene to my listeners, only to get to the climax to blow it, I let my listener down by second guessing the events as I remember them, or most often leaving out a crucial piece of information, having to back pedal to fill in the newly formed gaps. I guess I need to polish my delivery before I too am confronted by a certain five year old at bedtime wanting to hear a story that is better crafted than those found in her bedtime books. When it comes time for me to deliver, will I have the goods necessary to hold her captivated, or will I fail miserably. Will the story I tell her have to have a deeper meaning behind it, perhaps a moral at the end of it all not unlike one of Aesop's. What sort of things would I tell her about myself unwittingly through a story about my youthful shenanigans. All I know is that whatever I tell her, chances are it will be repeated, verbatim, to those who should probably not hear it.
You may think that I am making more out of this than I should, and if you are then you probably don't have kids. To say that your kids are your greatest audience, while at the same time being your biggest critic would be the understatement of the year. You at that moment have the power to mold them with your words, mold them into something you would like them to be, or turn them away from something which you don't. You have the ability to turn yourself into a superhero before their eyes, or dash their hopes with a misspoken tale of cowardice. As a parent, I hope that I have the ability to captivate my children with even the most mundane of events simply because I am their father. I want to be the one that they brag about during recess to all of their friends because of the one time that I...
So what's your story? And be sure to make it a good one.
Memories can come back with little cohesion between them, but often times they are little more than just scenes from your youth. What does it take to turn random thoughts and experiences into a true story? If someone came up to you and asked you to tell them a story, what would you come up with? Perhaps your first trip to a baseball game, or that time you went camping and told ghost stories, maybe even your first day at a new school. What thoughts and emotions would you hope to be able to convey? Were you nervous that first day of school, maybe you sat front row at the baseball game and were awed by seeing your heroes up close and in the flesh. Do you have what it takes to draw in those around you with an amazing tale of your daring expeditions as an eight year old?
I for one am a lousy story teller. I can usually manage to start off well enough, building tension and painting a pretty good picture of the scene to my listeners, only to get to the climax to blow it, I let my listener down by second guessing the events as I remember them, or most often leaving out a crucial piece of information, having to back pedal to fill in the newly formed gaps. I guess I need to polish my delivery before I too am confronted by a certain five year old at bedtime wanting to hear a story that is better crafted than those found in her bedtime books. When it comes time for me to deliver, will I have the goods necessary to hold her captivated, or will I fail miserably. Will the story I tell her have to have a deeper meaning behind it, perhaps a moral at the end of it all not unlike one of Aesop's. What sort of things would I tell her about myself unwittingly through a story about my youthful shenanigans. All I know is that whatever I tell her, chances are it will be repeated, verbatim, to those who should probably not hear it.
You may think that I am making more out of this than I should, and if you are then you probably don't have kids. To say that your kids are your greatest audience, while at the same time being your biggest critic would be the understatement of the year. You at that moment have the power to mold them with your words, mold them into something you would like them to be, or turn them away from something which you don't. You have the ability to turn yourself into a superhero before their eyes, or dash their hopes with a misspoken tale of cowardice. As a parent, I hope that I have the ability to captivate my children with even the most mundane of events simply because I am their father. I want to be the one that they brag about during recess to all of their friends because of the one time that I...
So what's your story? And be sure to make it a good one.
Perseverance
"Continuous effort - not strength or intelligence - is the key to unlocking our potential."
-Sir Winston Churchill
I'd like to think I possess a great deal of perseverance, whether or not I actually do may be debatable, but in my mind I'd like to think so. Whether it be at work, or at home or while running or training in martial arts, I tend to stick it out til the end in order to achieve whatever it is I am after. I have also realized through life that success can be measured by how much effort you put in. When I was 25 I started a business named Marketfresh Produce Co., and I worked, and worked, and worked. I loved every minute of it. I was proud. I was successful. In just a few years, I was selling over a million dollars worth of produce a year to some of the best restaurants in Chicago.
I woke up at midnight 6 days a week to start my day, by 2am on was on "The Street" as we called it, or the produce market to others. I hustled both literally and figuratively from one end to the other, several times for 3-4 hours every morning, loving every minute of it. From the smells of the fresh produce being unloaded from around the world, to the stench of diesel fumes that could leave your snot black with soot, I breathed it all in. The language was rough from everyone and the characters ran the gamut from the stereotypical to the downright insane, and somehow I felt right at home. Every conversation was an education in how to use the word fuck most effectively, and I was a pro. In explaining the Street to the uninitiated, I would often reference the Old West, it could be just that wild. While there were no gunfights, there were plenty of guns. The Street after all was situated in the middle of the projects, and its bright lights drew characters like a lamp draws flies. Hookers, hustlers, lumpers the market had it all, including cash. Lots of it.
The street ran on cash. And everyone carried it, myself included. One pocket carried a wad of cash almost as big as your fist, the other carried a knife because at 2am, in the middle of the projects you just never knew. Cash talked, because you could only yell so loud. It got you the freshest produce and it got you the fastest service. Because the faster you could get off the Street , the faster you cold make more money. In that business time was money. If I could get to a restaurant before some other asshole could, I was golden. In a business where the attitude was "what have you done for me lately?", being on time was everything. If I could out hustle all the other schmucks, with a better product, at a better price then I was unstoppable.
Life was good, work was hard, but never did I tire of the day to day hustle. My walk was fast as I moved down the Street , my talk was even faster. They called me The Kid because I was so young, I loved it, every minute of it. The old timers respected me, they saw the fire I had in my eyes. They all watched me grow and succeed, not only in business but as a person. I knew my shit, I had it together at 25 when most other 25 year olds were still acting like kids. I used that to my advantage, my eagerness to grow and learn attracted attention. In a few years I had several offers to merge. Offers from major players in the produce game, offers that had not been extended to anyone else. People saw in me what I knew about myself, if you work hard enough good things come to you.
Hard work doesn't scare me, never has. The harder the job, the bigger the challenge, the bigger the reward. Bring it on, all of it. I rarely ask for help, to me that is a sign of weakness, probably stupidly so, but that is how I work best. I have the mindset that nothing is impossible if you only try hard enough. While I don't always succeed, I do always try. Who wants to fail? Not me. But you never know what is going to happen if you don't at least try. I put everything I have into everything I do. I push harder when I would rather just quit. Knowing that the extra effort will pay dividends, maybe not immediately, but eventually. I may not be the smartest guy out there, and I am sure there is some other Kidout hustling even my hustle, but with a continuous drive forward I can't be stopped. I do what I do for me, for my family, for my friends. I work hard for the things I want, for what I feel I deserve. Maybe someday I can inspire someone to dig their heels in, try something they wouldn't have normally tried, push harder, or just dream bigger dreams.
-Sir Winston Churchill
I'd like to think I possess a great deal of perseverance, whether or not I actually do may be debatable, but in my mind I'd like to think so. Whether it be at work, or at home or while running or training in martial arts, I tend to stick it out til the end in order to achieve whatever it is I am after. I have also realized through life that success can be measured by how much effort you put in. When I was 25 I started a business named Marketfresh Produce Co., and I worked, and worked, and worked. I loved every minute of it. I was proud. I was successful. In just a few years, I was selling over a million dollars worth of produce a year to some of the best restaurants in Chicago.
I woke up at midnight 6 days a week to start my day, by 2am on was on "The Street" as we called it, or the produce market to others. I hustled both literally and figuratively from one end to the other, several times for 3-4 hours every morning, loving every minute of it. From the smells of the fresh produce being unloaded from around the world, to the stench of diesel fumes that could leave your snot black with soot, I breathed it all in. The language was rough from everyone and the characters ran the gamut from the stereotypical to the downright insane, and somehow I felt right at home. Every conversation was an education in how to use the word fuck most effectively, and I was a pro. In explaining the Street to the uninitiated, I would often reference the Old West, it could be just that wild. While there were no gunfights, there were plenty of guns. The Street after all was situated in the middle of the projects, and its bright lights drew characters like a lamp draws flies. Hookers, hustlers, lumpers the market had it all, including cash. Lots of it.
The street ran on cash. And everyone carried it, myself included. One pocket carried a wad of cash almost as big as your fist, the other carried a knife because at 2am, in the middle of the projects you just never knew. Cash talked, because you could only yell so loud. It got you the freshest produce and it got you the fastest service. Because the faster you could get off the Street , the faster you cold make more money. In that business time was money. If I could get to a restaurant before some other asshole could, I was golden. In a business where the attitude was "what have you done for me lately?", being on time was everything. If I could out hustle all the other schmucks, with a better product, at a better price then I was unstoppable.
Life was good, work was hard, but never did I tire of the day to day hustle. My walk was fast as I moved down the Street , my talk was even faster. They called me The Kid because I was so young, I loved it, every minute of it. The old timers respected me, they saw the fire I had in my eyes. They all watched me grow and succeed, not only in business but as a person. I knew my shit, I had it together at 25 when most other 25 year olds were still acting like kids. I used that to my advantage, my eagerness to grow and learn attracted attention. In a few years I had several offers to merge. Offers from major players in the produce game, offers that had not been extended to anyone else. People saw in me what I knew about myself, if you work hard enough good things come to you.
Hard work doesn't scare me, never has. The harder the job, the bigger the challenge, the bigger the reward. Bring it on, all of it. I rarely ask for help, to me that is a sign of weakness, probably stupidly so, but that is how I work best. I have the mindset that nothing is impossible if you only try hard enough. While I don't always succeed, I do always try. Who wants to fail? Not me. But you never know what is going to happen if you don't at least try. I put everything I have into everything I do. I push harder when I would rather just quit. Knowing that the extra effort will pay dividends, maybe not immediately, but eventually. I may not be the smartest guy out there, and I am sure there is some other Kidout hustling even my hustle, but with a continuous drive forward I can't be stopped. I do what I do for me, for my family, for my friends. I work hard for the things I want, for what I feel I deserve. Maybe someday I can inspire someone to dig their heels in, try something they wouldn't have normally tried, push harder, or just dream bigger dreams.
Words of Wisdom
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”-Marianne Williamson
Sunday, September 9, 2012
How Will You Be Paying For That Today?
If you were told you were never going to win the game you loved most would you still play? If you thought that you had almost no chance to succeed would you still try?
When the odds are stacked against you, and failure is the most likely outcome, do you rise to the challenge or raise the white flag?
In order to overcome obstacles, either in life or sport it perhaps only takes one thing; discipline. In order to be a better writer, you write, a lot. If you want to get faster you train. Need to lose a few pounds, then you lead a disciplined lifestyle of diet and exercise. When I wanted to learn about discipline I looked to an unlikely source that perhaps was the most obvious all along, Mike Tyson. Admired by most and hated by even more, Mike Tyson at his pinnacle was the epitome of discipline. When asked about discipline Mike says this "
Discipline is doing what you hate to do, but nonetheless doing it like you love it."
The interviwer then asked how do you do that? to which Mike replied: "discipline."
To me truer words have never been spoken. Most of us are goal driven, or even more specifically result driven. But how do you achieve those results? Discipline. Discipline of the mind, discipline of the body and discipline of lifestyle. As for me I like to set goals, usually quite lofty goals, but ones that are still achievable. I have found that if you set the goal to high, that you almost assume failure before you have even begun. Goals must also be tangible, reachable and their terms definite. Don't just say I want to lose weight, say I want to weigh xxx, by such and such a date. Don't just say I want be rich, say I want to have x amount of dollars in the bank by the time I turn 40.
But before a goal or result can ever be realized a certain transaction must take place. A certain 'this for that' type of transaction by which in order to attain result x, you must first give up, sacrifice, put on hold or surrender y . Why? because nothing in life comes easy. If you want to be a better runner, you must train, hours on end, week after week. So how do you pay for that training? You use your free time, time that could be spent doing myriad other things, that frankly might be more enjoyable in the short term, but the training will be more rewarding long term. And what is the currency you pay with? Discipline. The same principles apply to business as well. Whether you work for someone or are self employed, the harder you work, the greater the goals achieved. But again there is a price to pay and the universal currency is discipline.
Discipline to me is not all self flagelation though. Discipline is a balancing act. The ability to balance family life, with work and play while still achieving what you want is perhaps the trickiest of all. I wish I could set a training schedule that never got interrupted. But try telling a 8 year old and a 6 year old that Daddy has to go out for another run, or another ride. Watch their faces turn from excited to disappointed at the realization that yet again they lose while I win. So lately the balancing act has gotten a bit trickier. With the "Summer of Do" in full effect my mantra lately has been quality over quantity. Rather than the 7 or 8 miler I had hoped for, I find myself going out for a 4 miler. A hard and fast 4 miler,but a 4 none the less. Or lately, I find myself at work in the shop til 3 in the morning making up time so that I can get a project out somewhat close to the delivery date.
Without discipline I would probably just chuck it all in favor of just hanging with the family, or sleeping in or being contented with the status quo. That is just not my style. If I know I am capable, then I will push myslef. If I have an inkling that something is achievable through hard work and sacrifice, then I push all doubts out of my head and I go for it. Better yet, tell me I can't do something. I may struggle, and I may initially fail, but I will try. I will pay the price that needs to be paid in hard work, in sacrifice, in sweat and sometimes even tears, but I will try my hardest. The outcome may not always be pretty, but the goal will be met.
When the odds are stacked against you, and failure is the most likely outcome, do you rise to the challenge or raise the white flag?
In order to overcome obstacles, either in life or sport it perhaps only takes one thing; discipline. In order to be a better writer, you write, a lot. If you want to get faster you train. Need to lose a few pounds, then you lead a disciplined lifestyle of diet and exercise. When I wanted to learn about discipline I looked to an unlikely source that perhaps was the most obvious all along, Mike Tyson. Admired by most and hated by even more, Mike Tyson at his pinnacle was the epitome of discipline. When asked about discipline Mike says this "
Discipline is doing what you hate to do, but nonetheless doing it like you love it."
The interviwer then asked how do you do that? to which Mike replied: "discipline."
To me truer words have never been spoken. Most of us are goal driven, or even more specifically result driven. But how do you achieve those results? Discipline. Discipline of the mind, discipline of the body and discipline of lifestyle. As for me I like to set goals, usually quite lofty goals, but ones that are still achievable. I have found that if you set the goal to high, that you almost assume failure before you have even begun. Goals must also be tangible, reachable and their terms definite. Don't just say I want to lose weight, say I want to weigh xxx, by such and such a date. Don't just say I want be rich, say I want to have x amount of dollars in the bank by the time I turn 40.
But before a goal or result can ever be realized a certain transaction must take place. A certain 'this for that' type of transaction by which in order to attain result x, you must first give up, sacrifice, put on hold or surrender y . Why? because nothing in life comes easy. If you want to be a better runner, you must train, hours on end, week after week. So how do you pay for that training? You use your free time, time that could be spent doing myriad other things, that frankly might be more enjoyable in the short term, but the training will be more rewarding long term. And what is the currency you pay with? Discipline. The same principles apply to business as well. Whether you work for someone or are self employed, the harder you work, the greater the goals achieved. But again there is a price to pay and the universal currency is discipline.
Discipline to me is not all self flagelation though. Discipline is a balancing act. The ability to balance family life, with work and play while still achieving what you want is perhaps the trickiest of all. I wish I could set a training schedule that never got interrupted. But try telling a 8 year old and a 6 year old that Daddy has to go out for another run, or another ride. Watch their faces turn from excited to disappointed at the realization that yet again they lose while I win. So lately the balancing act has gotten a bit trickier. With the "Summer of Do" in full effect my mantra lately has been quality over quantity. Rather than the 7 or 8 miler I had hoped for, I find myself going out for a 4 miler. A hard and fast 4 miler,but a 4 none the less. Or lately, I find myself at work in the shop til 3 in the morning making up time so that I can get a project out somewhat close to the delivery date.
Without discipline I would probably just chuck it all in favor of just hanging with the family, or sleeping in or being contented with the status quo. That is just not my style. If I know I am capable, then I will push myslef. If I have an inkling that something is achievable through hard work and sacrifice, then I push all doubts out of my head and I go for it. Better yet, tell me I can't do something. I may struggle, and I may initially fail, but I will try. I will pay the price that needs to be paid in hard work, in sacrifice, in sweat and sometimes even tears, but I will try my hardest. The outcome may not always be pretty, but the goal will be met.
Thursday, September 6, 2012
Wednesday, June 6, 2012
Words of Wisdom
"Make no little plans. They have no magic to stir men's blood and probably will not themselves be realized."
-Daniel Burnham, Architect
Tuesday, June 5, 2012
Fortes Fortuna Adiuvat
Fortes Fortuna Adiuvat-Fortune Favors the Bold.
I have never been one to sit back and hope for something great to happen to me, I have never counted on luck to bring me what I want. I make my own luck. I learned early on that if you have to depend on the goodwill of another person in order to fulfill your desires, then you will surely be disappointed.
I am restless in my desire to succeed, to gain a sort of fame or notoriety, on whatever scale I so desire, and I almost always succeed. How? Because I am never satisfied with the status quo. Why should I be? If I am not moving forward, then I might as well be moving backward. For certain, things don't always go as planned, or sometimes they downright fail, but at least I try. The thought of letting something die, without trying to bring it to fruition disgusts me.
I have met many blowhards in my life, plenty of people with grand plans and visions, but most of them were all talk. Sure, most people can talk a good game, but can they actually see it through? When it is time to put up or shut up, I mostly hear silence. I promised myself a long time ago that I wouldn't be that guy. And for the most part I have fulfilled that promise to myself. And now, more than ever, I vow to never be that guy.
I am a man chasing a dream, and what is a man if he doesn't have a dream? He is nothing, he is already beaten. But no matter how many times I may come up short, I will not be beaten. The fire inside me to succeed will never be doused, the flames never snuffed out. My desire to better myself on a daily basis far outweighs any fears I may have about failure. You cannot truly appreciate success until you have failed. In fact, if all you ever did was succeed without failure, would you even realize your success? I doubt it.
Failure to me is often just a part of the journey towards success. To me, there is no better feeling than to accomplish not only something that others thought unlikely, but something I may have even doubted as well. To fail is to learn, or is failure the greatest teacher? Either way, you can learn a lot about a man in the face of failure. Does he throw his hands up and admit defeat? Or does he step back, reassess, and try again. I would like to think that I most often am the latter. Failure doesn't scare me, in fact, failure just reassures me that I am still trying.
Will I eventually find the success that I so desperately seek? I have absolutely no doubts when I ask myself that question, yes.Why? Because my personal history tells me so. Everything I set my mind to is realized.
Period. End of story.
Now ask yourself, what fortunes await you? Or are you willing to let them slip away without even trying? I couldn't live with myself if I didn't at least try. Could you?
I have never been one to sit back and hope for something great to happen to me, I have never counted on luck to bring me what I want. I make my own luck. I learned early on that if you have to depend on the goodwill of another person in order to fulfill your desires, then you will surely be disappointed.
I am restless in my desire to succeed, to gain a sort of fame or notoriety, on whatever scale I so desire, and I almost always succeed. How? Because I am never satisfied with the status quo. Why should I be? If I am not moving forward, then I might as well be moving backward. For certain, things don't always go as planned, or sometimes they downright fail, but at least I try. The thought of letting something die, without trying to bring it to fruition disgusts me.
I have met many blowhards in my life, plenty of people with grand plans and visions, but most of them were all talk. Sure, most people can talk a good game, but can they actually see it through? When it is time to put up or shut up, I mostly hear silence. I promised myself a long time ago that I wouldn't be that guy. And for the most part I have fulfilled that promise to myself. And now, more than ever, I vow to never be that guy.
I am a man chasing a dream, and what is a man if he doesn't have a dream? He is nothing, he is already beaten. But no matter how many times I may come up short, I will not be beaten. The fire inside me to succeed will never be doused, the flames never snuffed out. My desire to better myself on a daily basis far outweighs any fears I may have about failure. You cannot truly appreciate success until you have failed. In fact, if all you ever did was succeed without failure, would you even realize your success? I doubt it.
Failure to me is often just a part of the journey towards success. To me, there is no better feeling than to accomplish not only something that others thought unlikely, but something I may have even doubted as well. To fail is to learn, or is failure the greatest teacher? Either way, you can learn a lot about a man in the face of failure. Does he throw his hands up and admit defeat? Or does he step back, reassess, and try again. I would like to think that I most often am the latter. Failure doesn't scare me, in fact, failure just reassures me that I am still trying.
Will I eventually find the success that I so desperately seek? I have absolutely no doubts when I ask myself that question, yes.Why? Because my personal history tells me so. Everything I set my mind to is realized.
Period. End of story.
Now ask yourself, what fortunes await you? Or are you willing to let them slip away without even trying? I couldn't live with myself if I didn't at least try. Could you?
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